News from a Remote Gaelic Camelidae Community

Creative Writing, Media & Communications
Back in 1997 the isolated bifurcated-hoof inhabitants of far North West Wales depended heavily on the local Valleys rag for their link with the outside world. Let’s take a peek at what was making the front page in the far-flung Cymru Valleys on a typical day back then.

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The Daily Llama

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Friday, 13 June 1997, Vol 1, No 79

(Anglo-Welsh language lifestyle newsletter for the N/W Cymru community of Llamas & Alpacas)

www.llamalife.com.cy

Gwyl Tyddyn a Gardd Llamalife

Cymraeg

English

Editor: Llama Llewellyn-Jones

Editor, Daily Llama
Editor, Daily Llama

Editor’s Welcome … Llamas ac Alpacas am Cmyru! Hawddamor … gochel y twyllo dafad, y penfelyn Dolly Parton Sheep ys not ‘ch real MacLlama!!! Defnyddless hamfustyd git Dafyddna Rhys-Vanstone ys y blonegog camel ag gynhyrchu testiculyrs. A braiddyn arseferol fyckwyt Tonnay Abbytt synied Cardiff ys named arftyr llecyn (a place) ym Newydd Ddeau Cymru! Ditto Canadia! Lawn-mewn effenthidiot! A myfiggin serial Selth abusyr, Jones Taffy Howard, dremiau lyke ‘ch typical mutant Guanaco ar ‘ch particularly bayd dydd! Hefyd, poncey, fuddsy, Llardarss crossdressyr, Alexydd Downyr-Alpaca, plays golff off 26 – frym ‘r ladyes tees, ym hygh heels! Cardiff camels cymhuru ymd Welsh National Choir! Dai Llamas-Jones rhifo hwy sawl Taffy Howard yma digyt ym rear end am a vicuna. Must havye mystook i fer George Dubya’s!

Harwedd Feature Stori: ‘r Marxist-Llamas League (MLL) ystofedig attacks ym Alpacaglania Ilywodraeth. I takes ownership fer mercy killyng am smirky Liberalllama Deputy PM Maddog Costello-Lewis. Sloth learnyr Downyr-Alpaca has a thyng amdana Countess Duckula impersonators, esp Condeleeesa Rice-Crackers! Fewn y Tony Blair doll is popular ag depressyd llamas ac alpacas sawl gain a sense am moral superiority frym i. Holy St Bloddwen am ‘ch Crop Circles … ym gyflawn a chewers rhwystrau … golli! Os na Iwyddoch chi I canna cael Dai Davies ym ‘ch Swansea ffôn book!?! Deheuol alpacas frym Pontypool – pam felly diddeall? Na chewchew chi chew! Article: Oriel Guanaco-Luniautic

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Breaking News:

  • Camel internet porn ring exposed!
  • Vicuñas vote to end Polygamy

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Advertisements:

  • Your Ruminating Hoofer
  • Speak Llamese in Three Days!
  • Smoke Camelid Inca Lites
  • Llety Clip Llamawax Special!
  • Girl Camelids prefer Alpaca Smoothimage
    LLAMA GRAZIERS’ ALERT: High pressure ridge forming over Llancyst central districts; chance of stray goats.The Daily Llama supports the following community clubs & organisations:
  • Alpaca Backpackers & Weekend Wanderers
  • Llamamumma Vista Social Club.Ffôn: Llama Helpline 0179 5553683 E-bost: icouldjustspit@rwas.co.uk

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